dependence. some grace imparted by Sarah.

hey yall...I'm Sarah from Racing Towards Joy!

{Jessi is one of those ladies I constantly draw life from

so I'm honored to share here on her blog today!}

I gave birth 11 days ago,

to my second baby girl, Bethany.

I love having a brand new little one around again.

There's something so fresh and innocent about newborns

that brings life to my days.

But I totally forgot how needed I would be.

How dependent on me SHE would be.

I was totally slammed with the reality of a little person

being totally dependent on me when I had my first daughter 2 years ago.

It rocked my world.

And somehow I forgot it would be like this all over again.

Don't get me wrong.

I LOVE fulfilling her every need,

responding to her every cry, never putting her down,

feeding her at all hours.

(and this girl eats ALL the time. :) )

It's just that I forgot about the utter dependence of a newborn.

But God has shown me something through her need of me.

My mentor growing up called it

"Daily Desperate Dependence".

This need, this complete reliance on God,

that I MUST HAVE to even survive.

Just like my little baby.

I want to learn this lesson from her...

I want to wake from sleep

(literally and spiritually speaking)

CRYING OUT to Him to come and meet me...

and trusting that He will.

I am thankful for the journey of faith that God has had my little family on

for the last 8 years.

It has been one of desperate dependence...

whether we chose it or not.

Circumstances often required it.

Accounts have been negative, health has declined,

life has been taken, life has been given, changes have occurred.

All things that MADE us desperate

for HIS provision and protection.

And He showed up every. single. time.

Like Bethany is right now,

I desire to be so dependent on my Heavenly Father

that I cannot function daily without Him.

I think part of this dependence comes from remembering

all that He has already done for me.

All the needs He has already met, all the desires He has already fulfilled.

...and to be able to trust Him for even more.

I believe He designed it this way,

He made me His daughter.

He desires to meet my every need.

Because He is GOOD,

and I am desperately needing His goodness in my life,

every. single. day.