come on over, the water's fine.

Have you visited my other little internet baby (along with sweet Ellen - we're coparents), Sashes? 

If not, come on over. 

The water's fine. 

And today we're talking about CREATING. 

the big reveal, SASHES!

Hello sweet friends!

Hopefully you've read our little posts 

here and on Ellen's blog. 

Hopefully they've blessed you. 

We're ready to show you the real thing. 

Without further ado, 

would you go check out our new baby, 

Sashes to the Merchants. 

We pray it is a blessing to you and 

honoring to the Lord. 

Thank you soooooo much. 

building community, from the aisle to aloha!

So I've told you all a little about that night, right? 
The magical night at Starbucks where Ellen and I read proverbs 31 aloud and starting sketching notes about Sashes to the Merchants. 

"What if we could provide biblical encouragement, tips and tricks to help women in their creative endeavors, AND share some of these incredibly talented 

women with more people?!". 

And Lindsay was on both of our hearts. 

Lindsay is the brains and beauty behind Aisle to Aloha, a blog about the life of a woman who loves Jesus and is married to a navy man AND her amazing shop filled with creative and beautiful paintings. 

I asked Lindsay a few questions about this sweet online world and got to hear some of her thoughts on how she "sells her sashes to the merchants". 

Such great, wise words. 
Here is some of her beautiful art! 

Thank you Lindsay for sharing with us!
We hope you'll hop over to her blog or shop and be encouraged & inspired today. 

Thank you sweet friends for being so supportive and excited about what the Lord is doing through Sashes to the Merchants. Next week is a big week for this little endeavor or ours and we're so excited to share it with you in full.  For a preview of what is to come, you can follow us on twitter. 

sashes/building community/moxiemandie

It's another Sashes post! Enjoy what Ellen has to say below! 

When Jessi and I began this adventure called Sashes to the Merchants, one thing we really wanted to do is use real life, perfectly imperfect women to encourage the rest of us. In the spirit of not comparing but taking joy for each other and learning along the way, we want to build community.

One way we hope to do that is to give other women an opportunity to share their gifts and what God is teaching them as they put their hands to the plow.

Today, I'd love to introduce you to the lovely Mandie. Mandie owns an adorable handmade shop-Moxie Mandie-where she sells funky and sophisticated pillow covers, fun mug rugs and precious baby products. You won't meet a more encouraging friend, I promise. Mandie is in the business of building up and making community and it's a blessing to watch her do it.

Here's what Mandie has to say about the Proverbs 31 woman:

I see the parts of me that are nothing like the Proverbs 31 woman and wonder if there will ever be an overlapping of characteristics. I don't feel that I have any of her attributes, but I know that I need to acknowledge the things I am & not just focus on the negative. I do not rise early to work- it's the other way around. I am not often on top of 'the affairs of my home' and I sadly do eat the bread of idleness, & I am often convicted of such things. I know that since beginning sewing for others, I let my own home go (not that I was ever very motivated to 'keep' it), but have begun using the skills that I have & enjoy to do things for us. Instead of sewing pillows & pillows for others, I throw one in for myself occasionally, so that I can share the fruits of my labor with my husband, instead of just the mess. I enjoy trading my skill for another's so as to reduce the burden on us both, and our families. I have yet to make any real investments with my earnings, but I have plans in mind, aspirations to achieve. I wouldn't say that I'm a wise person, but I'm trying more and more to consider my decisions concerning business & to confer with my husband.

The Proverbs 31 Woman can easily intimidate, there's no mistaking that. But by finding one characteristic at a time to work on, I think she can be inspirational, & even helpful, too.

Don't you love the grace that Mandie has learned to have for herself? It's not about being all things at all times. We have to make choices. Let's set about dethroning these ideals of being able to accomplish everything all the time. I don't know why we do it to ourselves but I'm so thankful for Mandie's honesty about how she's learned to give some and take some.
(AND: Mandie is blessing us all with 15% off in 
her shop using coupon code SASHES. Enjoy!)

.........................

Would you like to be part of this community we're building? We're looking for Christian women with handmade shops (that includes you designery people, too!) to be part of Sashes. Leave your contact information in the comments (including shop information) and we'll be in touch!

sashes, she puts her big girl pants on

It was an unusually not-unbearably-hot evening when Ellen and I sat outside Starbucks and read Proverbs 31 aloud together. She looked super cute and I was wearing sweaty yoga pants. We'd outworn our welcome and the bucks was shut down, so we sat just outside and when we read these words outloud, I felt all sorts of electric sparks in my heart. 
There is so much there for women like us. 
And ps - we haven't decided what to call US. 
Bloggers, handmade shop owners, photographers, bakers, designers, mamas sitting on their couch after bedtime with a needle and thread and a heart full of dreams?!


Here's the part I'd like to speak to today: 

Proverbs 31:17 says, "She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong."

Now I'm all about some strength training & getting crazy with a pair of ten pounders, but I don't think that's what the Lord has for us here. I mean, maybe a little, but not directly. 

My husband and I talk a lot about "plates". 

What's on "your plate". Do you have a "big plate" or a "small plate"? 

Do you have a big "relational plate" or a good sized "task plate"?

Are you working with a teacup saucer or a straight up platter?

I have a tiny plate, relationally and task-wise. People in my life will tell you. If my to-do list is longer than five things and I'm at dinner with more than four people, I'm wigging out on the inside. I like to do things thoroughly and thoughtfully and with a LOT of margin. I want to be three minutes early, and have my assignment done before it's due, and all that craziness. My man, he's got a platter when it comes to tasks. He can have a massive to-do list, three different projects, and feed the kids dinner while doing the laundry and watching a football game and laughing about it all at once. 

But the point is, don't fret so much over the size of your plate, but know what the Lord has put on it. Is He calling you to zone in on your family for a while? To minister to the lost around you? Has he put a small business on your plate? A dream? A struggle? 

Look at it, ask Him. Don't compare it. It's your plate. For you, from Him. 

And then read Proverbs 31:17. 

What do you need to handle what's there? To be dressed with strength is a beautiful idea - but it's important that we're dressed with the strength to handle what is ours. I looked up a lot of different wisdom on this passage, and most of them boiled down to: "she puts on her big girl pants and deals with it". 

And what is surely implied is, in the power of Christ she does this. 

Let's take a long look at our plates today and ask the Lord what it would look like to be dressed in His strength to conquer them. Maybe...

- 30 extra minutes of prayer

- A thicker skin when it comes to blog comments or Etsy ratings

- a more persistent work ethic

- a gentle tongue

- more attention to what the Holy Spirit is doing

- to knock some other things off our plate? 

But surely, we're going to have to take a second and evaluate. 

Just a minute. 

Then, go get dressed. 

sashes part three.

Are you noticing a theme?:) 
This week's post is from sweet Ellen. Enjoy! 
...................

So.  This week Jessi and I are continuing on with tips and tricks learned from our own experience in endeavoring to use our gifts to bless our families.  

One thing I know about myself very well is that I am horrible at time management.  Just horrible at it.  I'm very easily distracted by another cup of coffee or an hour reading blogs or a few minutes on facebook or any other thing than work.  

I've learned to work by this principle: a body in motion stays in motion.  I don't have dedicated work times everyday but on the days that I do, I take a shower and get completely ready before I drop my older two children off at school.  And when I come back home with our youngest, I eat a quick breakfast and try to stay moving.

The truth is that if I sit down to savor the funner things first on work days, an hour has passed and I've forgotten much of what I needed to get done that day.  So I try to stay in motion.  Unload the dishwasher. Fold laundry. Get packages ready for the mail. Take a walk with a kidlet.  Anything that's at the top of my being intentional list for the day. 

And then when it's time to work, I can just work.  I don't have to shower or do maintenance kinds of things.  I can just work for my allotted time.  

I've had to accept this way of living bit by bit because the truth is that even though I'm an early bird, I love to have a slow morning.  But too many slow mornings lead to total chaos in my brain, heart and house.  The beauty of this whole shift is that sometimes, some glorious times, I get to have a slow morning anyway because I've made the most of my time.  Also. I always make sure I have a dedicated quiet morning around once a week.

A few encouragements for you:

1.  Get ready very first thing in the morning.

2. Try to stay in motion. Set a timer if you have to.

3. When you think you're done.  Try to do just one more little thing.  Just try.

I can't wait to hear from y'all.  Will you try to stay in motion? Do you already stay moving? Share if you'd like!

sashes part two, lessons learned from the big debut!

The first and foremost purpose of sashes will always be to provide biblical encouragement to all women. Ellen did that so beautifully last week. Our second purpose is providing tips and tricks and lessons learned the hard way (maybe the easy way) for women endeavoring to do something big on their own. Bloggers, small business owners, crafters, photographers, writers, endeavorers of all kind: our heart is for you. 

So in that light, I'd like to share what I learned from my big debut! 

Last week's open studio. 

Some backstory: I tried a few years ago to start doing graphic design work from home. The customers weren't there, the time wasn't there, the inspiration didn't come. My designs were bad and the whole thing was frustrating. When Glory was in the hospital this past spring with epilepsy, the idea for the Psalm 46:5 print came to me and it was the first I made. A few weeks later, I got brave enough to put some on the etsy shop and my hope was that maybe I'd sell a hundred in a year. I didn't anticipate selling 100 in a month and I was so encouraged by the whole thing! 

Then, sweet Ellen offered to let me do an open studio with her! A chance to pool all our communities and show them what we had for fall. I thought, "sure, why not?!" and had no idea what I was getting into. The first time Ellen and I met to discuss it, I was blown away with how little I knew. I hadn't though about business cards, display,  signage, receipts, having change... shoot, I hadn't really thought about ANYTHING. I spent the week before the open studio scurrying around like a chicken with, you know. Printing a gazillion prints, picking up last minute supplies, etc. etc. etc. And this was just a casual-at-home-open-studio! I can't imagine if I had been prepping for a show or market in the real-world! 

But here are some valuable lessons I learned, that I hope are a blessing for you. 

1. Do you first debut with an encouraging friend. 

I don't have any friends that are straight up discouraging, but it was incredibly beneficial for me to walk through this with someone who absolutely believes my prints need to be sold. And likewise, I am a massive fan of her work. I would absolutely encourage anyone I know to spend money on the items that she makes and I know she would say the same for me. We still oooh and aaaah over each other's new things and it's not superficial. I would highly suggest praying for and finding a friend like that, and moreover, BEING a friend like that to someone else if you're endeavoring something on your own. Or even if you're not. 

this is Lauren, not Ellen. She is also encouraging! 

2. Define success in realistic AND optimistic terms. 

I had two different mindsets about the open studio and honestly, I needed to function in both of them. My super optimistic lady in my head said something like, "pray that you'll sell out and make xxx amount of dollars! plan accordingly! prepare for business boost!". The nice little realistic lady in my brain said, "get excited to show people your product and stand behind it, thankful for what He's done in you! minister to those who come to the open studio and be glad for each and every word of scripture that you have a part of putting in someone's home!". Of course, the actual outcome of the open studio was a combination of the hopeful and the realistic plan. I had some sales and it was a boost to my business, but I had to let the wise and realistic voice coach the optimistic voice off the couch the next day. I could've been discouraged that I didn't make a billion dollars or sell out of all my product, but instead I was overly greatful that I'd exceeded my realistic goals. 

I think we need both those ladies in our head and heart. Dream big in the faith that God can use your endeavor however largely He wants to, but celebrate when He does it in realistic, tangible, normal ways as well. 

3. Determine that the work of your hands is profitable. BEFORE the doors open. 

I've really wrestled over proverbs 31:18 that says "she perceives her mechandise to be profitable". I love my little prints, but I worry that they're not as good as I think. I've had assurance from the Lord time and again that He wants me to make them, but I think I still really readily look to others to answer that question for me. Unfortunately, I think I went into our open studio with a big question mark on my heart. 

"is this work good? is my merchandise profitable?"

My only true regret of the night was not standing on what the Lord has done and giving Him glory for what He is doing through my business. I had a hard time letting close friends actually PAY me, and I wanted to write off compliments and encouragement. In hindsight, I wish that I'd looked at the work of my hands and seen: this is something the Lord has done. Creativity that He has given. If people want to pay for it, that shouldn't make me balk or want to hide! It's His work. My hands. Done & Done. 

So, those are tips from a newbie. 

- Get a good friend (and be a great friend). 

- Shoot for the stars & keep realistic goals all at once. 

- Conside that work good, sister. Cause it is. 

sashes, part one.

Today Ellen and I are teaming up to bring you something that will be an ongoing and continual coming-together-of-like-minded-women. 

Here's Ellen, here are our sashes.

I wonder about us women. Why we don't have more grace for ourselves. Why don't we?

Mostly I've been feeling that tug on my heart about work. Whether we work in or out of the home. Whether we work for real, actual, paper, big girl money or for hearts and souls and blessings for our family or for both. It's all important. I've been a full time working mom and a part time working mom and a full time stay at home and a, well, I don't even know how to describe myself now.

I want us to have grace for ourselves about our working. I want us to learn to be like the excellent wife of Proverbs 31 who "works with her hands with delight" (v.13).

What if we let our working at home and working for home and working from home and working away from home be a delight? A delight but not a definition.

It's going to take understanding that each woman's calling is different. It's going to take saying no to comparison. It's going to take disinviting perfectionism. It's going to take dethroning lists so that they serve us instead of us serving them.

It's going to take the grace of Christ in every inch of our being to find delight in our work. Not another reason we're not good enough or as good as. Not another reason we won't ever get it right. Not another reason for discontent. Not about payment or recognition or worth.

Just a delight. Just a way to bless our families. Just a way to be good stewards of what we have. Just a way to use the gifts we've been given.

Just a delight.

Will you? Will you seek to delight in your God-given, whatever it looks like work with me?

a testimony I've been waiting to share

1, 2, 3, 4

1, 2, 3, 4  

Disclaimer: this post is not me forcing my opinion about whether or not moms should work, it is only me sharing our testimony of what we believe the Lord has for us and what He's done for us. I know really wise, God-fearing women who work in the home and really wise, God-fearing women who work outside of the home too. And don't even get me started on single mamas. Working their sweet tales off in the home & out of the home. My heart is for you ladies. Bottom line: no condemnation here for anyone, ok? 

At dinner with friends the other night, we shared what we believe are the most common misconceptions about ourselves. I feel that mine, by far, is that I'm a mom-mom. You know what mom-moms are right? The girls that dream of being moms. That girls that got married to be moms. That were born to be moms. I'm no mom-mom. I've been terribly surprised at how much I love being a mom, but my intentions when we got married were a) not get pregnant for a looooong time (we lasted 8 months) and b) NEVER have kids close together (bahahahahhaha). My Nana can't take one look at me & my brood without declaring, "and we thought she'd NEVER have kids". 

So naturally, I began working outside of the home shortly after having Elias and was convinced I'd work outside of the home once Glory was born. Cause there was NO WAY I was staying home with two under two. Very long story short, my husband sat me down one evening and explained extremely lovingly and patiently that his end goal, his vision for our family, was not that I continue working outside the home. He knew that was terrifying for me and he wanted to walk slowly towards our goals, but he truly believed that to have the family dynamic he longed for - I'd have to walk towards the Proverbs 31 idea of "working at home" and he'd have to head 1 Timothy 5:8 very seriously. To be totally honest, I've learned enough that when Nick has an idea - it's usually a good one. I agreed and told him I'd give it a shot, though I had no idea what I was getting into. 

Skipping ahead in the story, we moved cross country to run a maternity home, had another baby (three under three, oh my) and when we left the maternity home two and half short years after having that first babe - I found myself a true stay at home mom, in a horrible economy, with three kids, no family nearby, and a husband in grad school. 

This is when the real testimony begins. 

Um, are we SURE about this? That's all I could think. 

I had a 2 year old, a 1 year old, and a newborn. 

No money, husband out looking for work every day. 

Sharing a car. 

Wonderful friends but no family to help out. 

Sweet husband in grad school. 

This wasn't being a "stay at home mom", it was just torture. 

An Anthropologie opened in the area. 

It would be so easy to just go. 
I'd managed there before. 

So we did it.

Only NICK applied, not me.

I think most of our family was confused about why I didn't just hop out and get a job, or at least try. But ya'll, we'd read all the scripture on Biblical marriage roles and our interpretation was that if the Lord intended for Nick to provide - He would provide for the providing. I had some incredibly, incredibly rough days as a mom that year and Nick had some incredibly, incredibly awful days searching for jobs and working at whatever he could find. We had ridiculously hard nights worrying about our family, praying for our family, releasing the care of our family to the Lord. And when we really asked Him what He wanted, we felt He always directed us to let Him provide financially through Nick, while I worked at home. At one point, I even tried tirelessly to do design work at home but it was a no-go. The inspiration, the customers, none of it came to me. 

What did come was intense trial-by-fire mothering. And Nick experienced leading a family through poverty while trying to keep himself encouraged. We both went through some of the hardest things that our biblical roles had to offer and the Lord provided. We lived WELL below the poverty level but we never missed a meal, our power was never turned off, and we had all that we needed. We rarely had want we wanted, but it was still one of the most powerful seasons of God working in our life. And we're thankful, not just to the Lord but to the friends and family who loved us and blessed us during that season. 

And now we're here. 

It's not a world of difference. 

Nick has a full time job and we're fairly certain that every job he has after this one will (Lord willing) be in ministry. I'm still at home with the kids. But here is the difference: we know how little we can live on. We know what we can do without. We know what it means to bless others when they need it, because we've been so incredibly blessed. I'm still wrestling with my biblical roles and Nick still wrestles with his and on bad days, I want to drive to Charlotte, walk in to Anthropologie and ask for my job back. And you know what, I think a lot of times - my kids would probably LIKE a nanny more than they'd like to be here with me. But the growth and fruit the Lord has set aside for us this season is more often found on the floor with my kids playing or laying in their bunk beds after a temper tantrum, talking about the gospel. You'll find growth when I'm praying through my frustration of not having a dishwasher, or when Elias asks why we live in such a small house, or when I put Benjamin in time-out even when it hurts my heart to do so, or when we bounce back from a bad day by throwing on some worship music & having a dance party. 

It's so hard for me and it's definitely not my dream job, 

but there's no where I'd rather be. 

And, for whatever reason, the Lord is prospering my little Etsy shop. I felt certain He told me to try design work back in April and I've been incredibly thankful for how He has faithfully brought customers to the shop & readers to the blog. I consider it God's vision for me "selling sashes to the merchants" like Proverbs 31 talks of. Also, we REALLY could've used that money to by BREAD AND MILK two years ago, and now we're able to bless others through adoption fundraising and fun things like that. So He chose not to grow it then and TO grow it now, and we're just kind of holding it all up to Him and asking Him how to use it. And not only has He brought business, He's brought ABILITY. He's given me the creativity and the time to run this shop & this blog and all the while, my kids don't know the difference. They wouldn't know what a blog is if you asked them and they could care less about Etsy.  

And that is our story. And maybe yours is totally different or maybe it's the same. And maybe you interpret scripture differently and I am totally ok with that. It's between you, and the Lord, and your husband. But my story is for the women who worry about money and more than money - they worry about ability. You can do it. 
Scratch that, you CAN'T do it. But He can. 

He'll provide. 

And, I want to share with you some other moms that are in the same spot, staying at home, doing side businesses to bless their family or their communities. My desire is that you'd want to bless them with some business as well.

Ellen from Handmade Recess makes INCREDIBLE bags

Danielle at Sugar Money is raising money for their adoption

Sara sells Noonday Collection to raise money for her adoption

Katie sells amazing TopKnotz Bows

Tiffany does great art of all kinds at Lalalu

Courtney from MaddyNBella will blow your mind with her jewels

& Laura from Splendor rocks my socks
Jacy at Lucylucybangbang has some BANGIN' dish towels   

and a deal for you: 

And in honor of all moms, future moms, or people supporting mamas selling' their sashes, here is a coupon code to my shop good for this whole weekend: use code SASHES for 10% off. Happy friday.