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Thursday, May 17, 2012

giving up good: marathon or book

If you don't know what we're up to - check out this post and this post
Also, be sure to see what Hayley is giving up on today. 
Then link up below!
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Let me set the scene for you: 
Today I walked in to my dear husband's office while he was sermon planning. He was all enraptured in scripture and prayer and I just sauntered in with my highly important and urgent question. 


"Hey babe! Stop praying for a second! What should I write about for my giving up on good post tomorrow?!" Ok, it didn't happen quite like that. And I did offer to come back later, but by that point, he was eager to help. 


exhibit a: hot husband demonstrates my weird "side smile" 
exhibit b: hot husband laughs at me
exhibit c: hot husband demonstrates my "crazy smile"


Nick: "what is giving up on good?"
Jessi: "Babe. For real. You know. You know, that link up I'm doing with Hayley where we talk about things we're giving up on to do something better. 
Imparting grace to women, you know."
Nick: "Oooooh, like the post where you talked about giving up on showers. 
Not your best move, Connolly."
Jessi: (dies laughing and throws paper at him)
Nick: "oh, I know! you should give up making those goofy faces you 
make when you take iphone self portraits. Would you give those up?"
Jessi: I throw something else at him. But I know it's true. I make stupid faces. 
Nick: "oh! you could talk about how you gave up on working out?!"
Jessi: "Love. Are you joking? I worked out Monday, Tuesday, 
and I'm going running this afternoon?"
Nick: "No, I mean how it's not your THING anymore."


And I knew he was right. 
And it's true. 
I've given up on being workout girl. 
Wannabe marathoner girl. Long distance runner girl. 


And that's kind of what I feel like is at the heart of "giving up on good". There are all these things that we possibly could BE. Could be all about, could "own", could be known for. 
And a lot of us (namely this lady right here) would like to be good at all the things. 
I would like to be a strong believer, amazing wife, full time and incredibly supportive, loving, nurturing mama, hard worker-bee running my own business... blah blah blah. You know all the things. You might want to be them too. And one of my things I used to want to be was marathon girl or super fit after three kids girl. 


But like I said - it's about identity. 
And who I am right now is Jessi, daughter of Christ. 
Coheir with Jesus. Redeemed and rescued. 
And there are some descriptors that the Lord has given this life - 3 kiddos, hot pastor husband, frequent mover, lover of online ministry. At one point during the last few months, as Nick and I were discussing dreams and goals and really how to do this interesting life where we could easily totally lose sight of what we're about - he sort of issued an ultimatum, which is different for him. He said very kindly, "Love. This year, you can write a book or you can run a marathon. You cannot do both." And he wasn't being so literal, but I heard his heart. 


I can't do all the things. I cannot be all the things. 


So I'm still working out. Trying to be faithful with my body. But the end goal has changed and I've given up on the good idea of being super physically fit. Faithful. 
But I gave up my second planned half marathon in January and I'm giving up the one I was going to do in September and I'm giving up the Chicago marathon too. 
Instead I'll stick with my homemade bootcamp with my friend Brittany and slow, painful three mile runs, and this redeemed mama of three body:)


but husband, don't think for a second I'm giving up my weird faces.
NOT FOR A SECOND.


What about you?
If you've realized you can't do all the things, 
which one are you giving up on? 
link up below - either her or on The Tiny Twig

1 comment:

The Arizona Russums said...

Amen sister. I've been thinking a lot about about how much of a role I want the "workout girl" identity to play in my life. And NEVER give up your faces. I love them. And Nick does an amazing impression of your crazy smile!