Around April 1st: Realize sweet Glory has colic and reflux and decide - while she is amazing - two children is enough.
summer of 2008: feel quite sure the baby maker is closed, for now. Jesus teaches me a lot about patience and timing and asking Him what He wants. Am also terrified of taking care of three kids.
August 9, 2008: my entire heart shifts in one day. While Nick and I are on a date night, he gets teary eyed talking about how much he likes our kids - what good people they are. After praying, we decide the Lord is saying the baby maker is not closed... if we really believe scripture, than we believe children in our youth is a blessing. Confused though, because I don't seem to be ovulating at all. Begin praying for twins. Post about said prayer here.
September 23, 2008: get diagnosed with autoimmune thyroid disease and am told probably not ovulating and should not get pregnant - too risky until levels are normal. Make appointment to meet with OB to discuss natural but reliable birth control options. Feel excited about this decision sort of being made for me.
September 29, 2008: night before the ob appointment. Nick is away at school and I have the weirdest night ever. The night before I had a dream that is only recurring for me when pregnant and I also am praying all day about why I'm so obsessed with Jon & Kate plus 8. I tell Lauren about the dream at 10pm and realize during our conversation - I don't need a test to tell me, I'm definitely pregnant. Test does confirm and I wait up until 1am to tell Nick. He's thrilled - thanks God. I'm scared to death but read this scripture and feel some peace.
September 30th, 2008: Go to OB appointment made for birth control conversation and tell them it's just not necessary. Hormones confirm I'm definitely pregnant. Have ultrasound - no baby found. Told I'm most likely having a ectopic pregnancy - will miscarry & maybe need surgery. Told to go home & wait.
Following days: pray a lot, cry a little. Feel confused and then ultimately a lot of peace. I have two kids - they are amazing blessings. I want to have open hands - take them when I can and know that God will take them when He needs to. Have a hard time talking about the future - is a surgery ahead? A baby? Is this our twins? Is it 17? Throw up about three times a day and wonder, and wonder, and wonder.
October 16th, 2008: It's the night before the ultrasound. I can't even think straight I'm so excited. I don't really have any fear about it being ectopic. I hope I'm not being naive - I just don't think it's going to happen. Either way - God is good. Either way - I'm already extremely blessed. Either way - I kind of need to go puke right now.
October 17th, 2008: Just got home from the ultrasound where we saw one sweet little baby. Not two, not seventeen - just one. Due in June - hmm... good time for family to come and visit.
I am thankful beyond words.
Family is all told. Despite all my talk about not making a big deal about it, Lauren just came home with a stuffed animal, maternity shirt, target giftcard, nausea medicine, dark chocolate & shredded wheat - my favorite post-puking food. She said it best - when else do you find out you're having a third baby?
Three under three, Lord - let's do this.
Three under three, Lord - let's do this.