not the messiah, at best a prophet

Sorry if the title confused you and you thought I was going to have a good word for you today, friends. Nope, this is just a blog bash in response to Lauren's lost theory.

Some things she said truthfully:

- our nights of ice cream debauchery while Nick studies are indeed fun

- she does not listen/watch well and then subsequently gets lost and then presses pause sixteen times per frame

- I do indeed iron my sheets & I will not apologize for it - do it once & you'll never go back.

Some things she should have said:

- I do not get confused about Lost, I'm on the same page with the writers and I believe I could write the ending better than they themselves can.

- I don't agree AT ALL with her trinitarian lost ideology. Not in the slightest.

The truth:

- John Locke is obviously not the messiah of the island. Everyone (Ben, Richard Halpert, & now Charles Widmore) is taking advantage of his crazy faith in the island. They're telling him he is special and he is nothing more than a pawn. Does the island bring him back to life? SURE. Did it de-paralyze him? Sure. Did it do the same thing for Christian, Jack's dad? Yes. If you have any sense at all you can deduce that John Locke is no more special than anyone else. When he leaves the island, he becomes an accident prone fool once again.

- I also do not agree with the trinitarian theory because I believe that the major villains would like us to believe there are religious undertones to the island's power - while truly they are all scientific. If ANYONE should be the messiah, we should look to Farraday. Yes, the crazy skinny scientist who in truth - has probably been alive since the time of the real Messiah (Jesus, not John Locke - since John Locke is nobody's messiah) himself. Farraday is the key.

- The pepper monster is nothing more than a biproduct of the space time continuum & should not be considered be linked with the Holy Spirit in the slightest. Oh, and Jacob? Come on - he is the ultimate sham.

Now, you can take your Lost advice from anyone you choose but here is where I rest my case. What Miss Hogan did not tell you is that last night, on the verge of tears, she pleaded that she herself needed a 'constant' to help her make sense of the time-flash-changing-phenomenon. I did not need such help. I would just like to know where baby Aaron is, thank you.

glimpses from bible study

I tried the other night to write a blog about all the girls in our house/ministry update and it was too hard. This is for sure the most intensive period we've ever had here at New Beginnings and there are days when I really would love to hear what the Lord is up to, but mostly we just roll with. It just seems so crazy that when we're all winding down and getting ready to move on, the ministry would pick up and take off. However, we are all trying to finish strong.

When I tried to write about all FIVE of the girls living here, I couldn't write about them lovingly and humorously at the same time and I didn't want anyone reading my blog to be confused about the amount that we love these crazy preggos. Now they are crazy and there are some hilarious and frightening nights around here, often, but we love them like nuts and feel more passionate than ever about being poured out for them while we are still here.

Then last night at Bible Study I realized that I could probably just give you some hilarious little pictures without telling you ALLLLLL about them, and possibly compromising some identities.

So - since I've been on modified bedrest and Lauren has been picking up a ton of slack around the house, I decided to take on bible study with the ladies - since I can prepare and deliver from the couch. Last night, with my crazy pneumonia, it was the last thing I felt like doing - but nonetheless, we started. Rather than trying to study a book of the bible or an actual book, I decided to pick a biblical word/principal each week - research it & discuss it with them. This is also helpful because they're all on really different pages spiritually and it made it easier to meet on common ground. Last night we started with grace.

so, some tidbits:
- Our newest girl speaks actually 0% english. ZERO. But she is about the sweetest thing ever and she was by far the most attentive, watching me, smiling and nodding her head. She even laughed a few times, apparently I am funny when I talk about Jesus.
- Our most intensive-spiritual-work-to-be-done-girl is a harcore muslim who snuck out of her house when she found out she was pregnant (three weeks before she delivered) in fear that her family might actually kill her for being pregnant. She literally stood up & walked out of bible study upon first mention of Jesus Christ. I have to say, while I wish she would have sat around to hear the word, I'm glad that she is not lukewarm.
- One time when discussing other religions, we were mentioning the "works" other gods require for salvation - i.e. animal sacrifices, praying five times daily, sinless living. One of the girls said, "oh yeah - and like kicking stuff. you know how some religions require you to kick stuff to go to heaven". I wish this girl didn't speak english & she had an excuse. Not so.
- At one point I was trying to give an example of how hard it is to forgive people when they hurt you and gave a personal example about a time someone had hurt me and it felt worse than murder. One of the girls looked at me knowingly and said, "ooooooh - he got a piercing?". Apparently piercing is worse than murder. (this girl also has had a tongue ring since age 10)
- At the end of it all, I have to say, I was amazed at how effective our little bible study was. One girl asked to be excused to get something to write with, only one person left in the middle, and at the end they all seemed to grasp the idea of being saved by grace, but only through faith.

If you think of it, keep praying for our ministry. I don't talk about it a ton on the blog, for their privacy & my sanity, but it is a hard job that is proving more and more worth it each day. Of all five, we're not sure that any of them know Christ personally and the process of birth/mothering/adoption is one of the greatest opportunities to share His grace & salvation.

either way: I'll keep the funny bible study stories coming for sure.

my second endorsement

IF I was a famous money-makin' mommy-blogger, I'd be doing this junk all the time. Getting paid to endorse some great company or product & telling you how it's changed my life. Well, I'm not and so I'm not. That is - I'm not getting paid to endorse this product but I want to anyhow because I love it & the person that gave it to me!

Around a year ago, just before Glory was born, I was sitting in my new women's group - massively pregnant - looking around the room, hoping soon I'd feel at home and have some real friends. Knock, knock, knock on the door and this little blonde beauty peeks her head in to see where the lost and found is. She's carrying her sleeping little three month old and she was CUTE. Dressed cute, cute hair, and since she was so darn cute - the leader of our group just asked if she wanted to stay and do bible study with us! I was so glad she did, because I saw her and wanted to be friends with her asap!
So, now a year later, sweet Marilee is still in my life and she is cuter than ever. More than that, she loves Jesus and is a really sweet loving friend to our family. She came to play last week (with SI SI), and brought about the most thoughtful gift ever.


She'd read this blog I wrote about the tie onesie I wanted to get for Baby Tres and had someone make us one! So here is a picture of our first real item that is for Tres alone (not a hand-me-down) and here is a link to the sweet girl who made the onesie. I've been looking at this blog all week trying to pick which item I want to get next! Nick even saw the union-jack little shirts and said he wanted some in his size. Hmph. We'll see.

about nothing important

*** Warning: This is an extremely superficial blog. Read without judgment. ***

As of this May, I will have been pregnant for three years - minus nine months, four months in between pregnancy one and two - five months in between pregnancy two and three. During all of those months that I wasn't pregnant, I was nursing. I don't count that as a curse, but as a major - major blessing. Nonetheless, that many months of pregnancy does not do a body good. I'm learning to embrace this mommy body, with the hopes that after this pregnancy I can go back to just a normal body, but in the meantime - I have to be EXTREMELY creative with ways to look hot for my man.

Thus, hair and skin quality have become somewhat of an obsession. I focus way more on my nails than I ever did before, I shave my legs very regularly, and I basically just try to take care of all the other parts that I can control right now - since I can't control stretch marks and baby bellies.

Ok, preamble is over. Confession: I am OBSESSED with my hair. With the color, the cut, how I style it. It doesn't always show in how it looks, but it too has been beaten by almost thirty months of pregnancy and the well-water at our house. It's gone from silky and long and a little wavy to thick and really hard to manage and ugly curly, but I refuse to give in. So for literally the past two years - I've been trying to make the best of the curl that increases by the hour, and make it be pretty wavy. I've tried different products, different styling tips, different curling irons - but alas, I could not reach my goal. Which was really something like this:



Well, I'm delighted to say after much research, I've figured out how to do it! One night a few weeks ago, I went to dinner with Lauren & Kalle and saw a girl with my same hair length and quality and her hair looked EXACTLY like how I wanted mine to look. I tried to chase her down (true story) after she paid her bill and ask her how she did it, but my big old preggo self couldn't catch her. However, the next day, I renewed my dedication and asked Lauren to come up to my room and help me figure it out. About six tries later, I think I finally got it. When I get well, I'll style it up and take a picture for y'all, but mine looks a little more like this, just way shorter:


Not exactly that good yet, mind you.

Ok, so if you want to do the beachy ringlet wave - here is a great video that helped me figure it out. Who knew you did it with a flat iron?! I plan to wear my hair exclusively like this for a while... at least till it grows out a bit more. My favorite part, the next day - you just touch it up and if you're really pushing it, the third day, you can throw it back like this:



Ok, good luck ladies. And thanks for indulging my crazies. Maybe the next totally mindless post will be about the hair masks that I've had to start doing to increase my hair quality from all the flat ironing.

a sick, thankful Sunday

August 2008: Sweet Kelly Cowan tells me she is pregnant again & I email her a few days later to say, "oooh! Can I please throw you a family tree shower?" knowing she loves family history & this is a fun idea.

January 2009: planning for the shower goes into high gear. I insist on making handmade invitations rather than evites, because - come on, this is going to be a classy deal. All of us throwing the shower start an ongoing email putting together the menu, decor, fun games, & such to make the greatest shower we can imagine.

This past week: we all run around making our plans and purchases, getting extremely excited. I make up what I think is the funnest shower game ever (see bottom note) and have happy dreams about playing it at Kelly's & making her feel loved.

Last night, 8pm: Elias wakes up a little grumpy from a sweet slumber complaining that his "baby" hurts, you know - the one in his belly. Precious. He seems fine, so we cuddle in bed and I kiss his sweet face and realize I have a little bit of a sore throat. I also think to myself, "hmm... I hope he's not REALLY sick. Maybe I shouldn't kiss him so much".

9pm: Sweet E pukes all over me & our bed. Dang.
Forty minutes later he seems fine and I resolve to make it through the night, go to the shower the next day and not breathe on ANYONE.

10pm: I'm writing a text message to Kalle saying, "this is the scary part where you just sit scared by the monitor and pray you don't hear them again because that means they're really sick". After I hit send, I hear a moan & before I make it back to our bed carrying him, Elias pukes again. Dang. Dang.

10:40pm: I'm writing a text message to Lauren this time, saying, "now I just pray I don't hear Glory getting sick". As I hit send, I hear Glory puke. Dang. Dang. Dang.

11:00pm: Nick is holding Glory - covered in towels for when she pukes again, Elias is in our bed - covered with towels in case he pukes again. I am in the bathroom, puking.
Dang. Dang. Dang. Dang.

midnight - 11am Sunday
lots of thrashing and tears and moaning and puking, and now - coughing

12pm Sunday:
Lauren takes all my supplies to Kalle for the shower, I shed a little tear.

2pm: I stop throwing up and start the uncontrollably coughing fits. I finally fall asleep for a few minutes and try not to think about the fact that the shower I so want to be at is starting right now.

8pm: I'm back in bed, still coughing and planning on a doctor's visit tomorrow. Just beyond thankful that this didn't happen while Nick was gone, beyond thankful that Nick is totally healthy & the kids seem to be on the mend. Totally thankful this didn't happen tonight when I could have unknowingly infected all the ladies at the shower today. So, thanks Jesus.


**** now for the funnest shower game ever ****
I think I made this up, but maybe someone has done it before.
I used this website and made twenty pictures of projected baby faces using Kelly & Jason, friends coming to the shower, and celebrities. I used all sorts of combinations (think Kelly & Marilyn Manson, Jason & Rihanna, myself & Brad Pitt). And of course - I made just one picture of a projected baby face using Kelly & Jason's picture. Posted them all on a posterboard & shower attendees had to pick Kelly & Jason's baby. I hope it was fun!

first boston blog

(it's a long one - but worth it)

My first blog about us moving to Boston should probably start with our decision making process, or maybe the story of how God first ignited our passion for the northeast a few years ago, or maybe even telling the blog world about my husband's mission and vision for a church - something that still leaves me in awe. I pictured this blog going much differently, but since Nick blogged so candidly about his trip and his excitement for our new city last week - I'm going to start blogging about Boston by telling you how I came to take these sweet pictures of my girl in a new tutu.

I suppose I should go back just a smidge and tell you a little about the day this past christmas-season when Nick and I were talking (read: arguing) about Boston for like, the hundreth time. I knew his heart was to plant a church there, I knew we'd eventually end up there - I just didn't want to go NOW, as in this year. We'd only been in the northwest a year, I'd just started to make friends that I wanted to keep for a lifetime (and still will), and I really wanted to stay here - grow as a family and have an "easy" life. He was interviewing for a job that was sort of both of our dreams for him, and yet - he was still feeling unsettled, like we needed to go now. During said "discussion", he challenged me to pray with him for a week and see if the Lord would change my heart. I love him & I love Jesus and so, I took his challenge - pretty sure that Jesus would tell him I was right and he was wrong. Three days of prayer in, I knew I wasn't going to be so lucky.




So now, almost three months later, we've started this crazy process and begun to tell friends and family. He's been to Boston to visit and talk and see the city, I've started to look at homes online for us. But crap, I still have to leave these great people. I hate leaving places - we JUST left Charlotte and I'm still getting over that. Now we do have Sirk, who deserves a blog herself, and her love and friendship is assuring and hopeful - but moving with just one friend is a little terrifying, especially when you're a lover of lady fellowship like myself.



Enter Michelle, her husband Pastor Dave, her son Elias and her daughter Piper Glory (yes, that's for real). They are friends of Miss Sirk - which automatically makes them awesome, and she is what we like to call a ppwtb (pretty pastor's wife that blogs), and we started up a little internet friendship. That soon turned into me spending hours writing facebook messages with her about kids, how to keep marriage and love alive in ministry, families of origin, and Boston fashion - of course. Nick got to meet her & great Dave last week and while I was sorely jealous, I was so enthralled to hear Nick talk about them - her awesome voice, his sound ministry ideas, their potty training plans, and the like.

Now to the tutu. It's a sleepy Saturday & I'm on the phone with my sister trying to convince her to be a guest blogger on here and I see Nick holding up this precious tutu! What?! I love tutus, I've only written 2,056 blogs about them & I've yet to buy one for my girl - but I love them nonetheless. I immediately yell "Where is that from?!" and he very plainly answered,
"... a good friend".



Right he was, as soon as I got off the phone, I not only found the precious tutu but also a sweet notecard, an amazing piece of art done by one Elias for the other, and a written story that did actually bring some tears to my eyes. It was all about her tiny Eli asking if he could "pick treshy (thats me) up in my hands and bring her to my house". ah. Too much. So we promptly started coloring something for the Eli from Boston and put gloriana in her new duds and took six thousand pictures. But tonight I'm going to just say some prayers for Sirk, Michelle, Dave, Elias, & Piper. Some big, big thank you prayers to Jesus. We're moving all the way across country (again) and leaving some good friends (again), but gaining some new ones and once again - Jesus has prepared the way.

Treshy's come, Eli. Get ready.

reunited & it feels so good

Two videos for you.

First, the kids wrestling with daddy. My favorite part is Glory's grunting & the three of them all panting at the end.


Second, proof for all of you that my girl is the toughest on the block.


ENJOY!

day three

What do I say about the last forty-eight hours? 

I could write a whole blog about New Beginnings stuff. A new girl in, a girl giving birth, an adoption, the girls watching step up 2 for the 6th time in two days, our sink finally getting fixed but leaving our house in shambles overnight? Hmph. 

I could write a whole separate blog about my kids and this time alone with them. How it's so much easier than I expected, how I feel like I've grown 6,000 times closer to both of them, how they so desperately and intrinsically miss their daddy, about baby tres and how I think he is going to be really sweet because he's been super active - but every time I have a contraction hard enough to scare me, he backs off. How Elias sweetly sat beside me feeding me a mocha frappachino light today, he held the cup & everything, just because he thought I'd give him some, he was wrong. Or about Miss Glory and how she killed two pieces of leftover pizza for lunch. 

I would love to write about my husband & how much being apart from him makes me appreciate him, about how neither of us are phone people so we've talked like six minutes in three days - but hearing the excitement and peace in his voice is so telling and so encouraging. I should write about the number of emails I've gotten in the past few days in response to his blogs saying, "Boston! What?" because I thought we weren't really going so public, but eventually I'll explain it all. Or let him do that. 

Mostly, I'd like to write like 100 mindless blogs. About the bachelor or american idol and that crazy tatiana, about how my cell phone charger has a short in it and it takes me an hour to get it to work. About the new candles I bought today or about potty training and how tempted I am to throw a diaper on that butt & walk away from it all. Oooh, I'd also like to write a blog about how I am ALWAYS the girl at the stop light who is going straight but jumps and tries to go when the left turn lane gets a green light, even though the straight one is still red. 

It would be sweet to write about friends, too. About my sister and how a long phone call with her once every week does my heart some good (I'd like it much more often, but realistically - thats pretty darn good for us). I might write about Lauren and how much more sensitive she is than me and how that makes her so good at her job and how much my kids love her. About Marilee and her sweet gift for Tres (actually, I WILL blog about that because I promised I would). I've been writing in my head all afternoon about Kalle and how awesome it is that I can call her and hear her voice and feel better and ask her to rebuke me and even though she has no idea what for, she very sternly says, "You need to change your attitude" and she's right and I do and it's better. What about my best friends from college and the emails we're passing back and forth these days - I could definitely write about the good those little letters are doing me. 

But for now, on day three of husband-gone-ministry-gone-wild-trying-to-keep-a-calm-uterus-week, I will just write this long synopsis and make a list of what to write next. 

the sweetest kisses on earth

Our Glory-girl is about the prettiest little fireball I've ever met.
She will bat her eyelashes at you as she swats the top layer of epidermis off of your face, but she WILL.NOT.CUDDLE.
She won't hug or snuggle or anything, she's just too feisty and hardcore and we love her that way.

Until today, oh - sweet today.
All of a sudden she was looking at me fondly as I was telling her the story of her birthday (true story), and she looked like she wanted to kiss me. So I said, "Glor - you want to kiss me?" And this is what happened. Thank goodness my handy flip camera was nearby so I could video us together in our sweet moment that may never happen again!

simple prayers.

Praying some simple, simple prayers today.

For my kids - that they would know how much the Father loves them
because of the way I show them love.
For my husband - safety and comfort, excitement and anticipation.
For our house - repentance & truth.
For myself - more thankfulness & gratefulness.

also, if you're a charlatte friend, I know that isn't our home anymore, but we sure do love that city and want to see the way Jesus wants to see it. Check this out.

Ok, friends, what are you praying for today?

life, modified

Chapter 1:

Well this has certainly been an interesting week. 

It's funny - as I look back on the last seven days, it really seems like I should be discouraged or more tired, but I'm totally not... I'm energized and excited for tomorrow. 

Monday and Tuesdays were two of the most productive days I've had in almost my whole life and I felt on top of my game. UNTIL Tuesday night when my normal braxton hicks contractions turned stronger and stronger until I couldn't sit like normal or stand or do anything but lean over on all fours and whine. That night, I drank a lot of water and took some melatonin to pass out, but the next morning - as soon as I stood up, they started again. 

Nick and I spent the morning kind of laughing about it - while I continued to run after the kids and cart Elias up and down the stairs each time he whispered "pee pee". By that afternoon though, I knew I had to call my doctor because I couldn't quite function. After a few hours of being monitored in labor and delivery and another day or so of the same massive, unending contractions - we started to figure out that this was different than what I've experience in my last two pregnancies and something we needed to take seriously. 

So, I'm on "modified bedrest" which basically looks like normal life with some restrictions. No carrying Elias or carrying Glory for extended amounts of time. No running up the stairs sixteen times a day or sweeping after each meal. No two and half mile walks with Lauren and no cleaning my shower. Wait, I never do that. The point it, after a few days of watching it and being careful, I've started to get it under control. 

Also, we still do not have a name for this child. We were totally set on one and totally threw it out the window. We may call him Elias Powell Connolly #2. I sure love that name for a boy. 

Chapter 2:

On another note - we live life EXTREMELY modified here at New Beginnings. I'm serious you guys, you actually wouldn't believe 50% of the stories of what goes on here if I told you. I think Lauren and I are going to need to find a way to change the names in situations and any identifying characteristics and start posting a story a week. Maybe we'll call it "How-in-the-heck-do-we-not-pee-our-pants-daily-Wednesday" or something. Maybe "Why-haven't-we-started-to-pull-our-hair-out-this-is-so-nuts-Thursday"?

Chapter 3:  

I'll be doing life extremely modified the next few days, sans husband. If you saw the video from my last post, or if you ever read my blog, or if you even know me in general - you know I'm mildly obsessed with my mate. I think he's just about the greatest thing in the whole world and I don't like doing a night away from him, much less FOUR! When he is gone for a night, I usually turn into a driveling pile of dog doodoo, but I have to say I'm really excited for this trip for him. I'm excited to spend a few funny days with my bebes alone. I'm also excited because this is going to be such a great trip for Nick, BUT, I'm going to let him blog about all the details.

My list of things to do at night while he is gone: 

LOTS of tv, obvi. 

paint my nails. 

clean my shower. (ha)

read the 50,000 baby name book in it's entirety. 

whatever else fun you guys suggest. 

ok. that's it for me, now. 

have a good Sunday night, loves. 

vday punked

....sooooooo......
Nick got me a new flip video recorder for Valentines Day.
Blog readers are going to either love or hate this because every other post may be a video of my cutey little kids.

For the first video though, here is Nick and I acting dumb.
The backstory is Lauren watched the kids while we went to our fancy vday dinner date and then decided to come home on and put some comfy clothes on before a movie. We thought the kids were still awake and being mischievous and decided to catch them with the video camera being crazy - enjoy.

fashion friday for v-day

Ok, ok. I know I said I'm happy just to give my bebes love for Vday, but this is fantasy.
Here's what I wish was going to be waiting for them on Saturday morning as they eat their heart-shaped pancakes.

For Miss Glory.
a tutu to start


a hat to top it all off...


some sweet purple kicks,


... and that's right - if her dad would let me, I'd pierce those cutey ears.


For my big man:
have to represent the fam


for tumbling & breakdance practice


& his dreambed.


... & because even little boys need to feel fierce.


Lastly - in fantasy land. A little something for baby tres.


ok, ok... I'm really done now.
Just a little fantasy shirt for me to wear on our vday date.


Happy Valentines, y'all!

brother-lover

My poor kids have about six billion nicknames. Elias is E, Ebug, brother, goose, handsome-bandsome (don't ask), & whatever else comes out of my mouth at the time. Glory is worse. Anything to do with beauty-queen, sister, princess, NeNe (her alter-ego from the real housewives of atlanta), she gets it all. 

Yesterday I accidentally called Elias "lover" a few times in an attempt to say "brother". Freudian slip, I think so. 

We're having a little family love day. Both of my kiddos are going on almost two weeks of a bad nagging cold that is making them sweet as pie. They're that good kind of sick where their noses run green and they cough like maniacs, but they want to giggle and cuddle and touch foreheads at breakfast. Elias woke up at like ten pm last night, just to cough and lay between Nick and I as we watched Lost - sweetly holding both of our hands. Glor-glor's two front teeth are almost all the way in, and those big chompers just make me melt when we have a laughing session as I change her diaper. 

The budget is not doing so well that I can get these munchkins EXACTLY what I want to get them for Valentines this week (a push-walking toy for glory and a pretty new headband and a tutu and her first manicure... a big boy bed with cars sheets and blankets and pillows and sixty pairs of armani baby manpants for Elias), but I will take a lovey day like today with them over a plethora of presents. 

I may even pull out my camera this afternoon and snap a few shots of my lovers. 

Thats right, I said it. 

it's luuuurrrve.

I am officially in Valentines mode.

 

Come on, friends, please delurk and share some vday suggestions. 

What should we do with our kiddos? Our husbands? All the pregnant women living with you? 

Oh, wait... that's just me. 

turning it around

This will be super quick. I've got two kids napping, a pile of fresh laundry, and a bible sitting beside me. 

So I'm wondering - how do you do a quick turn around when you're having a rough day? 

I woke up this morning feeling like I could actually conquer the world. I almost wrote a blog during breakfast to say, 

"la-la-la-la all is right with the world! ministry is doing good, marriage is good!, my son just asked to pray with me, potty training is easier than I ever imagined, and our new nanny is coming to take care of elias so I can get stuff done around the house for two hours! 

HURRAH FOR ME!" 

Thank you Jesus for keeping me from writing that blog, because I would have been annoyed with myself only moments later. During the next two hours, we had THREE potty accidents (which is as many as we've had in about five days and which kind of negates the help I'm getting from said nanny when I'm constantly running up and down the stairs to get fresh manpants and jeans) and while I was able to get a lot accomplished, I just felt ugh - yuck. I had to literally keep counting in my head to make my stress level go down, I could feel my blood just pulsing. 

Ministry has been a mess the last week or two, if you've been reading Lauren's blog - you've probably been worried for our safety, or at least our sanity. Well, last night the two of us were walking and talking and praying and we felt the tide turning. After some prayer, we had one of the most productive meetings we've ever had with the girls and just felt ahhhh.... good. Today we've been lied to and annoyed and it just feels like one step forward, six steps back. We have another interview at 5pm, and I want to look at that girl with love and mercy and acceptance - not doubt & fear. 

So here's my plan of attack - 

I'm going to drink a big bottle of water. 

I'm going to read psalm 16, because for whatever reason - it's doing my heart good these days. 

I'm going to fold this laundry so it doesn't get crinkled and so we have more big boy manpants for my little boy to wear when we he wakes up. 

Tonight, when the kids are asleep I'm going to do biggest loser yoga because it is hard and makes me sweat and makes me feel productive. 

I will watch the Bachelor & read Leigh's post on it to make myself laugh. 

Tonight I'm going to snuggle with my husband and hear how his day was, 

NOT cry to him about mine. Loving on him always makes me feel good. 

Also - when he expects me to cry & I smile, he is proud and I LOVE making him proud. 

ok, what would you do? what do you do when it all goes south too quickly? 

grace is...

Last week our pastor was talking about how an encounter with his daughter showed him grace and all week, in little passing points, I've thought - this is grace. So, this is sort of in lieu to a thankful Thursday, on a Saturday.

... Grace is God helping us to sell our Charlotte townhouse just before the housing crisis started. That enabled us to pay off all our debt and to sort of escape the economy all together with no house payment, car payment, etc.
... on that note, Grace is us living off support in the middle of a recession/depression and God always providing.
... I see God's grace in the fact that I'm married to my high school sweetheart - who I thought was too handsome, too Godly, too amazing for me then... and I still think so now.
... Grace is haphazardly becoming a parent and then finding yourself on your third baby two years later. The bulk of my sanctification comes from raising these two. Without them in my life, I fear I'd still be incredibly selfish (more so than I still am) and obsessed with my own fame.
... Grace is friends near and far who I have barely anytime to talk to, but can feel incredibly supported by - with a quick email or text message.
.. Grace is Lauren Hogan, being on Elias peepee watch while Nick and I get ready for datenight.
... grace is my Glory-girl, sweetly saying "heeeeyyyyy" when I go to get her up in the morning.

what is it for you this week?

update! update! potty update!

Seriously - I am beside myself with gratitude.
First - I would like to thank my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, the giver of all good things and the mover of bowels.
Second - I would like to make the producers of rice milk and cheerios who caused my son to hit his maximum limit of food intake before he could expel some.
Third - I'd like to thank my husband, who took several different segments of time out of his busy day to sit beside Elias when he became uncertain of this whole "potty" thing.
Fourth - I'd like to my mother for her understanding when I hung up on her abruptly when my son looked at me with a funny face and said urgently "potty!"
And lastly - I'd like to thank my sweet two year old, for being so incredibly nonchalant about the whole ordeal.

The day started off a little rocky, Elias did not want a diaper on, but the toilet freaked him out. He had two really quick little carpet peepees, but even when he put a diaper on for naptime - he refused to go #1 or #2 in it. That boy is JUST like his daddy and when he wants to do something his way, he WILL do it. He kind of danced around with a full bladder all day, not wanting to wet his new cars "man pants" and not quite sure how to overcome his stage fright of the plastic toilet. I was a little worried his stubbornness was going to give him a kidney infection.

Then, around four o'clock pm, his bladder overcame him and he just sat down and did. Filled that whole little bowl like it was no big deal. About an hour later, during dinner, he urgently said the word and went #2 on the pot! AMEN!
Seriously, you know you are a mom when a little poop makes you cry and scream and yell "praise God!!!!". Even Nick was overcome with joy and said, "now - THAT, is blogworthy".

Tomorrow may be filled with accidents and we may not have such victory for a few more days, but we had a TREMENDOUS first day of potty training and I am so thankful.

so apparently, today is the day.

This morning when I went to get E out of his crib, his pants were totally off and his diaper was on the ground. Hmpphhhh.

Then, when we brought out the potty this morning - the diaper was off before I could get the potty out of the box and now - he's refusing to put it back on.

Apparently, without much hype from us - Elias has decided it is potty training time. So far we've had one accident and while the idea of sitting on the potty is a little scary - having daddy sit with us helps a lot!

...we'll keep you updated.

potty plan

Ok - I've read three different books & consulted a few friends and I think I've got my game plan. I haven't decided our exact day of execution because Nick and I are still trying to make some travel plans for this month & I don't want to totally screw with Elias' head. I feel like if I at least state my objectives on here, hopefully you all will continue to give me tips & encouragement and maybe if it goes really well, this will be helpful for others.

Step 1: Introducing the potty, big boy underwear, & work on undressing.
For the next few days & possibly weeks, we're just going to leave his new potty out and let him sit on it as he pleases - with or without intention. E often asks to go potty, but then gets freaked out when we put him on the adult potty so I'm hoping this will bridge the first scary gap.
Also, I've taken like sixteen quizzes entitled, "Is your child ready to potty train?" and the one indicator that we haven't conquered is pulling down & putting on his own pants. So we're going to work on that one.

Step 2: A week of wetting.
Once we think E has a good idea of the potty & underwear - we're just going to go for it. This will probably mean staying home for a few days and constantly just telling him, "go sit on the potty". We're going to go hardcore no diapers, except at his one nap & bedtime. I will probably throw up six hundred times at the smell of urine, but I'm in it to win it.

Step 2.5: Treats
E is obsessed with stickers so somewhere in the bathroom we'll do a sticker chart and he can put a new one up each time he goes - number 1 or 2. We'll do some small sort of candy for peepees & a big "snack" (a fruit snack) for poopoos.

Step 3: Pray & keep lots of extra little boy pants around.

... that's all I've got for now.

I'm coming back, I hope.

First it was Christmas, then vacation, then a crazy few days & Elias' birthday and the superbowl and blah, blah, blah. The first thing I need to explain is that my sweet husband has been pounding away trying to speed finish a class during the whole month of January. This means that while I have my phone for checking email and updating facebook, I have no real computer for blogging or emailing. I actually have several long emails and about sixteen blogs that I want to write. So, sweet Lauren has offered me her laptop this evening so I can play computer catchup. 

In the meantime, here are a few blog topics that I would like to explore in the near future: 

- Elias' second birthday party. Lots of kids, lots of amazing friends, & lots of cars. 

- Potty training. Today I armed myself with three different books, a comfy toddler potty, and some sweet cars little man underwear. I think there will be lots of blogs about this subject coming up - but for now, let's just say I'm optimistic. 

- Our crazy house. For right now, I'm at the top of a love rollercoaster with our nuts ministry. Sometimes the insanity drives me, well, insane - but right now I feel like God is stirring something up and it is meaningful instead of mind-numbing. 

- The final stretch. I have roughly 15 more weeks of pregnancy. 15 weeks to get my junk together meaning get a healthy system down for laundry, chores, & all the other hard parts of motherhood & homemakerness. I also want to go into this baby like a fighter goes into the ring - it's not like I can work on my abs but I want the rest of my body to be in the best shape possible so that c-section recovery is as easy as possible. 

ok. That's what is coming up. 

What's going on with you?