oh my achin' heart

I was that mom who dreamed about preschool. 

When Elias was about a year old, I started looking at preschools in Washington state. How much were they? How long did they go? What educational value did the offer? I would make jokes about how preschool couldn't come soon enough. 

I want to punch that three years ago Jessi in the mouth today. 

A few months ago, we decided it was definitely time. Preschool was definitely right for Elias and he was craving school like no other. We knew if he went and Glory didn't, I'd be getting punched in the mouth. (sidebar: where does she GET that violent behavior?!) And so we researched and prayed and put our names on the list. 

And wait, hold up. Is it already September? 

Well, then I suppose it's time for this. 

pre-preschool breakfast

do they HAVE to go? 

i suppose so. 

males of the world, I'm warning you now. Forget her dad. She will CUT you.

toddler ladies. sure, he's handsome and all, but all that hair?!
he'd have to go for haircuts like once a month. his dad sure does.

oh Lord. They're yours. 

So we did lots of talking about salt & light. 
A meet-the-teacher day. 
A few "school supplies" trips to make Benja feel like he's in the cool crowd. 
One sweet bebe may not have made it the whole first day. 
They had FANTASTIC second & third days. 
And just like that, we're a school family. 


Elias LOVES school. He's a natural. 
Glory tentatively loves school. I will say this, I'm incredibly impressed each time I come to pick her up and peek in her class and see her sitting on her spot on the reading rug. For like FOUR MINUTES STRAIGHT. 
Benja, obvi, loves them going to school. I may have set a bad pattern because the past two days he's asked to go to Target and Starbucks, specifically. Oh lawdy. 
And me, I love school. I feel like I'm definitely a school mom. 
I love the early mornings, the three hours with just one kiddo, how precious they are when they return. Somehow Elias has quadrupled in smartness, Glory's cuteness has exploded all over this earth, and Benja... welllllll, we already knew I was his biggest fan. 


And this is our new life. 
And I'm thankful. 
.............................
pppppps: have you seen this new print? 
It is literally my fave so far & I printed one for myself ASAP & framed that puppy. 
Also, the past few weeks, I've been working on a lot of baby announcements, shower invites, and custom prints and I'm falling back in love with custom work. Have a project you need done? Contact me. 

oh, and this one too!

Happiest of Fridays to you friends. 
Call on His great name! 

the notebook

Like most people, when I first started blogging, “document our life” was very high on my list of purposes. And still, one of my favorite things is to look back a year ago or two years ago and see what we were doing, what the kids were up to.  And sometimes now that my purposes have changes I feel bad. My kids, this family, is my actual whole world. And yet it’s a pretty small fraction of this ol’ blog.

And I have good reasons ya’ll, so I probably won’t start blogging about them every day. My main reason is this: the last thing I want this corner of the internet to be is a trophy case where I show off my accomplishments. And at some point as a mama, you start loving your kids so hard that you can’t talk about them without shaking your head and saying, “man, he/she is so cute”.

But I still want to study them and know them. And document them.  So last week I went and bought three little fake moleskins. One for a Naptime Diaries to-do list since it was taking over my real life to-do list. The second was for a life to-do list. Somewhere to write “take off busted nail polish” and “PUT UP LAUNDRY, no for real – PUT IT UP”. The third I labeled “thoughts” and decided I’d just record my thoughts on the kids and our family. My prayers for them, my observations, desires, and silly memories that I don’t want to forget.

So here are some things that have gone in there since Thursday night

-  I love literally the way every word comes out of Benja’s mouth at this age. I want to laugh at all his phrases and words. Sometimes when other people are around, I’ll start laughing and making him repeat the most mundane things. Because they’re so cute.

- Even though it was months ago, I want to etch the memory of Glory waking up from her seizures in my brain.  This week, for whatever reason, I’ve been overwhelmed with the picture. When they told us she wouldn’t wake up for days and we had no clue what she’d be like when she woke up. And I was sitting beside her, stroking her hair and reading Isaiah 61 to her. And Kristin was sitting with us and she confirmed that I wasn’t crazy, Glory was responding. And she popped her eyes open and said “mama”. That memory brings me to my knees in praise.

-       Elias is really the only one in the family who appreciates my modern, interpretive dance in our family dance hour. Whether it’s Katie Perry or Florence or Coldplay,

 he likes my creepy moves.

- One thing I want to work on and get great at is having great beds for the kids. When they look back on their childhood, I want them to remember climbing into a clean, warm, comfy bed - positively exhausted by all our living and loving.

-  Lately I’m overwhelmed by how precious my children are to the Lord, and thus to me. Layla really spurred me in this when I heard her talk about her kids. Now, even if I have to look for the precious under the tantrums and bruised shins, I search for it.

-  Yesterday I was heading out the door to go to a little girl’s breakfast reunion an hour and a half away and at the last minute Glory asked me with her big beautiful eyes if she could go with me. It would turn my blissfully quiet three hours in the car into a mommy-daughter whirlwind, but the face she made when I said, “ok! Get dressed real quick!” was priceless. She actually hyperventilated a little.

-  The kids have GREATLY improved at cleaning up lately. Thank you Lord.

That’s all I've got for now.

I love them. They’re awfully amazing. Thank you, Lord. 

you know what? (and a giveaway!)

You know what? 

You know what I love? 

(after Jesus and the hot hunk of man-meat that is my husband)

I love my kiddos. 

I like how Elias still wants to hold my hand thrice daily and also gave me a bloody nose the other day while we were wrestling (true story). I love how Glory screams, "I'm going to blow your house DOWN!" in the middle of her really good temper tantrums, but I love how right after that fit is over, she'll say, "Sorry Mommy. I want to act like a princess, not a scary witch" (true story). I love how Benja gives me high fives all day long and helps me cook, but also - I love how he hides little bits of mushed up banana all over the house for me to find three days later. I love their sweet little guts so much. 

I read this post by Casey and was so encouraged this weekend. Just to remember, that even when they wake up super early and there seem like so many of them, and you step on mushed up banana at 5am - these kiddos are just straight blessings. All of them. 

And reading. I love reading with my flock. I tell Nick all the time, reading books with Elias and Glory is like this weirdo wake up call, that oh-my-goodness-we-have-kids! Not babies, so much, but full blown kids who are learning and growing and are a little bit smarter than we are sometimes, it seems. 

So today, I'm going to take a few extra minutes, cuddle up on my couch (after removing the banana peel that is inevitably stuck in between the cushions), and read to my kiddos. 

And in honor of that, I'm going to have a giveaway right here on the interwebs! For you! 

Piggy Toes Press sent me a few books to try out and they are INCREDIBLE. Amazing prices, great for all ages, and super informative. We've been loving Who's in the Ocean by Dorothea DePrisco, because our kids are currently on an intense "fish-zoo" kick (their name for the aquarium). The art is incredible, the information is top-notch, and the kids and I cannot get enough of them. 

I want you to have a cuddle-and-read-as-many-books-as-you-can-get-your-hands-on kinda day, so let's have a giveaway shall we?! And because I've got three kids, I'm giving you three chances to win a wonderful set of books from Piggy Toes Press. Comment for each entry and I'll draw a winner on Friday! 1st chance: leave a comment telling me your favorite book, children's or not, 2nd chance: like Piggy Toes press on facebook,  link here, or follow on twitter, here 3rd chance: follow this blog by clicking follow over there > or here, on facebook. 

Enjoy, ya'll! 

I hope you had a wonderful weekend! 

um.

If I disappear suddenly, I think you
guys know who to investigate.

Have you ever seen three such vengeful faces?

On the other hand, if I tell them they are dressed in six thousand layers for the purpose of going on a w-a-l-k! That's a different story....

Enough said. Welcome to my life.

***post edit: I cannot help myself. I've been looking at this post dying laughing for five minutes. Please confirm you've done the same thing.

kid crazy

This is just a tidbit about my nutty kiddos. PLEASE, please laugh as hard as I do at them.

#1. We have a potty predicament. Some of you may remember the potty training attempt I made with Elias back in February. Seriously, totally successful but I ended up quitting and going back to diapers because running him up and down the stairs made me have major contractions when I was pregnant with Benj.

Welllll.....

I was inspired by a friend to let my kids start trying the potty again, even though I felt very little pressure for them to be potty trained yet. Imagine my surprise when within like two seconds Glory pees on the potty! WHAT?! The rest of that day, she kept saying, "Mommy! peepee!" or "Mommy! Poopoo!" and I'd pull out the potty and she'd just go. No frills. No drama. Just going potty. When she finishes she asks for a treat like it's not big deal.

So, three days later and um.... she hasn't had a wet or poopy diaper since. She thinks she's potty trained! Who is she?! Before you start thinking I'm bragging or showing off, I'll equal it out for you: Everytime Glory goes potty, Elias tries too. Not once in three days. Oops, I should've ran with it in February. (don't worry we give him treats too)

#2. My kids are learning about creation right now. Super sweet.
So something I say a few times a day is:
"Tell me about all the things God made!!!!"
(and Elias has a strict routine of his list)
"LIGHT!" "WATER!" "WAFFFFFLESSSSS!"
how do I even go on to adam & eve when God created waffles?

#3. Another thing we're working on is middle names.
Elias is really sweet on his sister and we've often heard him call her "gooeyana"
and lately he's been telling us "gooeyana is eloise!". To help him understand, we started explaining middle names so I've been hearing this a lot:
"Daddy Powell Connnnolllllllolll"
"Mommy is Powell?"
and "I'm a connolllolll boy!"
(ebug's middle name is Powell)

and now, just some silly pictures.

name that photo

If I was a cool, famous blogger - I'd have you all submit captions for this sweet pic of my sweet girl and give away a prize to the best one. 

However, I am not and I will not. 

However -  you will have my undying love and affection if you pick a good one. 

My caption: "When I have a daughter, she will NEVER wear pink!"

Nick's: Azteca Barbie. 

And also, while we're at it... 

If you've ever wondered how I take my children anywhere alone - here is your answer. 

That's our train, er- stroller. Enjoy!

things I'll never say

Oh how I wish this post was about my favorite memory in the whole world that is attached to this song (things i'll never say), a convertible, and the morning of my wedding.

 Alas, that is another blog in itself. 

No, this is about a blog of Kelly's that inspired me. 

She wrote about things she never thought she'd be into &

one thing I NEVER thought I'd do would be....

Spell out words. 

And yet I do. My little babes are becoming more verbal by the minute - seriously, it is FREAKISH. Elias has been practically mute for two years and all of a sudden now, he is speaking whole sentences out of the blue! 

So here are the words I am destined to spell out for 

the next few years, I'm afraid: 

• t-r-e-a-t. (this can mean anything from a cookie to a special trip) 
• b-a-t-h. (my kids love baths more than life itself. i've found myself just eradicating the word shower or bath from my vocabulary and instead I say, "Tomorrow morning I need to work out and then take a b-a-t-h." even if my kids are not around.)
• w-a-l-k. (meaning - in the stroller, around the neighborhood)
• b-y-e-b-y-e. (glory is the biggest social butterfly i've ever met and she wakes up in the morning ready to go 'byebye!'. i try not to tell her we're leaving until the second we walk out the door but she has learned a few triggers: if I pull out benj's carseat, if I put on makeup or shoes, or if i look for the keys - she starts screaming "BYEBYE!")
• h-o-u-s-e. (elias happens to be the opposite of gloriana in that he is a HUGE homebody. so if we're out somewhere and i accidentally say house, it's all over. he also know when we get of the highway if we're going home or not and will cry or delight accordingly. 
• w-o-r-d-w-o-r-l-d. (their favorite show in the whole universe.)
• s-n-a-c-k. (saying this world in the wrong context to a connolly child is also dangerous. 'snack' can only mean a packet of fruit snacks. if you say, "Elias - you want a snack?!" and give him banana, watch your back sister.

and lastly.....

• d-a-d-d-y. if I can't produce him in an instant or take them to where he is, it's better if i just pretended he doesn't exist. i've tried redirecting them to pray for him, draw a picture for him, call him, look at pictures of him... no go. he is the ultimate t-r-e-a-t. 

super blessed!

Having guests is always fun! 

Having friends who you really want to catch up with be your guests is even more fun!

Having guests who happen to be the best photographers in America & take pictures of your beautiful children is 

the best!

Please go here to understand why I might be beside myself thrilled. 

reunited & it feels so good

Two videos for you.

First, the kids wrestling with daddy. My favorite part is Glory's grunting & the three of them all panting at the end.


Second, proof for all of you that my girl is the toughest on the block.


ENJOY!

Just a taste.

I just edited our Christmas pictures and my kids are soooo cute in them, I'm about to go wake them up just to pinch their cheeks and call them good-looking. I'll try to only do a few, but I may go nuts here.

family pic


nativity playtime with Kelly & Jason

big wheel goodness

my whole life. I see this face my whole life.

typical connolly craziness

loving her dolly

practicing clapping for brother

a special minute with dad

overjoyed.

wrapping it all up

I'll just hit the highlights:

• About three presents in on Christmas morning, Elias realized he was a toy-obsessed maniac. It was kind of fun to watch.
  
• He hasn't really put his guitar down. When he needs to eat or play with another toy, he just slings it around his back. UNLESS he's sharing with the Cowan girls - which they all did quite nicely!
• We got Gloriana dressed up in one of her new outfits from the Ladd donation & she was...EXQUISITE! She usually wears kind of grubby clothing because well, she is a little bit of a grubby girl. But when we put her in her Christmas finest, she was really breathtaking. Today I bought her some sweet hair bows that she finally has a little tuft to hold & she will be wearing tights & skirts for the next few years straight. Sorry, gal.
  
• We had an amazing time with the Cowan/Flower clan. There is no replacement for family, but if there was - it would be good, Godly friends with sweet, beautiful babies who love your babies. Thanks for having us, friends!
• My husband got me some awesome new perfume & lotion, and a smattering of other things which I don't deserve. Books, magazines, christmas flowers & more. Thanks for nurturing my gift-centered love language.
  
• Since our kiddos did so great sharing a room Christmas night up at the Cowans, we used some Target gift cards to buy Glory's new crib mattress so she can finally inhabit the room with Elias! Nick gets his office back & I get my "laundry room" back! Yay!
• and lastly... we booked our tickets back East tonight to see family. It will be three weeks late for Christmas, but we get to see our loved ones & celebrate all over again.

Pics to come!

quickie

Nick and I are at "A Day with Dr. Don" at Mars Hill, hearing Dr. DA Carson give four different mini-lectures. So far I've felt really blessed by his wisdom and overwhelmed with thankfulness for a few hours to sit beside my husband, learn a little, and discuss something really important to his heart - theology.

I'm also REALLY thankful to LarLar for watching the kids all day while we enjoy this together! We ichatted with the kiddos during our break and you can see what gets to put up with:

the goose & the lamb cage fight

So our kids have really become obsessed with one another in the past few days... it's been really sweet to watch. Glory has been hooked on Elias for some time now, but he is just starting to see what fun she can be. The past few days have been filled with them yelling (shreaking) at one another and Elias yelling "GOOOOEEEEY!", lots of wrestling matches, and not a few laughs. As you'll see in the following pictures, Elias' favorite new move is to stand behind Glor when she is laying on her stomach and flop onto her back. You'd think she might cry or feel uncomfortable, but usually she flops over (still underneath him), claws his face like a madwoman, and a wrestling match begins! Dear Jesus, please let this baby be a boy so our little lamb isn't stuck wrestling with our handsome silly goose. However... if it is a girl, the two of them could definitely take him!

handsome 

I don't even know what to do with this smile....

... and he got her... 

...and she got away.... 

but he got her again!

This is my view. 

And Nick relaxing...

Getting some glor-glor love. 

& fighting over a magazine! 

ENJOY!

thank you nonny!

don't crawl and no more words

I'm leaving today for four and a half days for Meredith's wedding!

I really could not be more excited and sad all at once. I am so thrilled to be with Mere and her girls this week, but a little bit devastated to be leaving my kiddos for so long! All the baby food is made and ready, Elias' meals are planned, their laundry is clean and the diapers are restocked. The preggos know not to bother Nick, and Debi, Miles, & Lauren are all ready to step in if they catch him pulling his own hair out. All jokes aside, Nick is going to do AMAZING and I'm so excited for the kids to get this time with him. They are truly blessed with such a great daddy!

So - I'm sure wedding and fun girly blogs will be coming in the next few days, but for now this is just a reminder to my sweet little lamb & my big boy that she is not allowed to start officially crawling and he is not allowed to learn any more words.

Love ya'll!

kids in the same room, take 1

So I reread all the sweet comments you cutey little blog readers suggested about putting my kids in the same nursery. Um, what in the heck does it mean that it will all work out?! Hahaha.... Kelly and Rachel, I love both of you - but it did not "work out"! Last night we did bedtime as usual - Elias and Glory have always shared the same bedtime routine. Dinner together, diapers changed, jammies on, dad reading, rocking all together - Dad and Elias in the rocker, Mommy & Glory on the stool. We showed Elias how Glory was going to get in her crib and how he'd stay in his.... let him feel it out.

Now, to back up - around 90% of the time, Glory falls asleep on her own without any passy or blanket, just sort of singing herself to sleep. The other 10% of the time is ugh... another story. Those nights, she screams for about thirty minutes - with her eyes shut - until she finally lets us come in and stuff a passy in her mouth and she passes out. She won't actually take a passy or I'd start off with that from the get go. It's honestly a crap shoot. Elias goes to sleep at 7pm and we don't even HEAR him until 8am, sometimes as late as 9am. He is actually a teenage boy in a toddlers body.

So, back to last night. Glory wasn't the one who started the crying - but sweet little Elias. I honestly think he was crazy worried about her, because he just kept looking at her huffing and puffing... this of course greatly disturbed her. So I let them carry on for about twenty minutes, then patted her to sleep and rocked him for a while until he was sure she was ok. Elias woke up a few times before midnight, huffing and puffing again (REALLY not like him) until he was convinced she was alright. All quiet for a while.

I woke up at 1am to Glory seriously - singing. I don't know who woke up who, but I'm assuming that Elias woke her up and she then decided it was time to be awake and couldn't fall back asleep. I was so exasperated I grabbed all her stuff, had Nick give her a bottle, and then set her back up in Nick's office. Elias still continued to wake up SEVERAL times, even without her in the room, and we had to rock him & calm him down.

I'm at a loss. I'm not giving up. I will be victorious. I'm going to give them a few days to get the hang of it at naptime and try nighttime out again in a few days. It's 1:28 and naptime starts in 32 minutes. I have a calm, cool exterior but I'm sweating bullets on the inside. Pray for us, ya'll.

A few Tidbits

- I love it when Godly woman use sarcasm to express righteous anger. Please read.

- Nick and I went to Portland, Oregon today and it was so fun! He's going to Western Seminary starting this fall (on Mondays and over the internet) so I got to see his school, his favorite bookstore - Powells, and quite possibly the greatest thrift store in the world. I got a beautiful designer dress for Mere's rehearsal dinner (SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS WEDDING!) for $13.00!

- I really did love seeing Portland. It is definitely the kind of place I really enjoyed visiting, but I don't think I'd want to live there. I told Nick that I felt better as a person for having seen people and a place like that, so committed to social change and the health of our world. I want to always be intentional to let Christ do that work in me, that wants health for the environment, the world, and God's people. Please do picture me getting accosted by a greenpeace worker. Normally I would feel a little perturbed to be stopped in the middle of the street when I was in a hurry, but something about working for a nonprofit makes my heart a little more inclined to hear people out about stuff like that now. He was a cute little greenpeace worker too, and by cute I meet fumbly and nervous.... and I quote, "they've cut down like like like four whole france's or something of forest". Cutey.

- Speaking of Merry, my sweet best friend from college is getting married on September 20th and I am so excited. She, along with rest of my fabulous bridesmaids, made my wedding day so incredibly amazing. I am really so ready to be there for her, to make her feel as special as she is, and to honor her and Craig as they start this new little adventure. ALSO, I'm going to be taking my first trip sans-babies. I'm excited, sad, thrilled, scared, and confident in Nick all at once. Today was good preparation since it was the first time I'd left Glory for more than like 4 hours, but 4 days is going to be a whole other story!

- While we were gone today, Lauren had an amazing time with the kids. I can tell they had an amazing time with her too! She even took a little video with both of them for my (and your) viewing pleasure!

Is it seriously already Sunday again?

So - no, I know it's actually Saturday night but it's almost Sunday. Last Sunday is the last full day I really remember feeling like I was alive. Let me give you a brief update of our lives since my last post.

When Elias finally quit throwing up and Glory was back in bed, Nick and I sat back against our pillows and sighed with relief. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my cell phone light up and I immediately started laughing - with two girls 40 weeks pregnant, I knew our night was nowhere near over. Sure enough, Mickaela's water had broken.

The next forty-eight hours are blurry. I know I got the virus in diarrhea form, Glory got it in throw up form, Lauren got it in throw-up form, & Debi (who runs our ministry) got it in diarrhea form. Mickaela spent 28 hours in labor and eventually had an emergency c-section. (Her sweet baby girl is beautiful)

Our kids have cried & whined for countless hours and between the two of us - we've gotten barely any sleep. There were some sweet moments - Anaya Grace is beautiful & Mickaela is adjusting really well. Marilee made us so many great dairy-free delights that I've been munching on for days. I had some sweet Jesus time at small group. Kalle and I got to hang out for two days in a row, and we haven't for weeks. Also - I got to some awesome phone conversations this week. One HOUR convo with my sis, a good talk with Merry & and a nice update with Luh Hood.

Sooooo... a summary of the week:
- Our ministry here is hard, but so good. Especially when babies are born.
- I am now a germaphobic freak. Watch out for me & my Lysol can.
- I officially miss Charlotte/family intensely. Officially. Intensely.
- My mom was right, when it comes to kids: "One is none & two is twenty." And I'm adding on to that phrase - "When you all get a virus - you want to slit your wrists." Oh wait, that doesn't rhyme.
- Lastly, I'm really glad blogger is letting you write blogs & post them in the future because when I do have time to write, I always want to write like three at a time and then I don't have time for a while.


(ps - here is beautiful Anaya. Look for more new pics under Our pictures Link)

Welcome back, self

So I stopped blogging for awhile because I didn't really have time and didn't see the purpose - but lately I've been missing writing and this is such a great outlet for my thrashing emotions and deep thoughts. Ha, or hilarious Elias stories and/or the sickest recipes ever that I make up sometimes.

So here's something to start it off with:

Elias is staying at his Grand Nanny's because we're celebrating our 2 year anniversary. Tonight Nick asked me what my dreams were. That sounds like such a basic question, but it's one he doesn't ask me often. My desires in life have shifted so much in the past two years, I haven't really gotten to sit and gauge what my ultimate dream is. Two years ago I thought I'd be the next Beth Moore (ha) and now I feel like it's great if I truly mean what I'm saying during worship once a week. So I really started thinking and these are the three random dreams that I actually desire.

a) to defy family odds, to prove the world (even the Christian world) wrong. Everyone says the next few years are going to be so hard. Everyone says that marriage at 20, pregnant at 21, baby #1 at 22 and however many to come is going to kill us - atleast for a few years. I want it to make us the most joy-filled, spent, child-adoring, spouse-loving, and Christ-like family possible. I don't want us to be perfect. I want us to be us, real people who love God. I know that sounds naive, but I actually don't care. I want to be purposeful and see everything as a gift, not as a burden.

b) when my kids are school-aged, I want to have a closet/space that is chockfull of school supplies. Stacks and stacks of paper, pens, glue, and crayons. Not to allow them to be wasteful but so they know when it comes to learning & creativity - the supplies are limitless. This isn't derived from any neglect from my childhood (I always had school supplies - I just refused to use them), but it's probably more directly linked to my inner connection between having mundane household supplies (toilet paper, windex, & hand soap) and my feeling of security. We could have $0.03 to our name, but if we have an 8 pack of paper towels, I feel like we're millionaires.

c) my last dream is to be exactly the opposite of myself as a mom, always. For example, I'm really selfish and I love sleep but last night (in a rare mommy-alter-ego moment), I became the better version of me. Elias was sick or just extra finnicky for some reason and cried from 12am until 2am. He never does that. We tried to let him cry it out and finally we realized, he was just extra upset and needed us. After we pulled him into bed with us, I was exhausted, but from 2:00am - 2:30, all I could do was hold him, kiss him, and stare at him. I didn't even want to sleep. I'm one of the worst people I know, and my dream is to be the opposite, the best mom I know.


Those are my dreams. Weird, but mine.